MATCH MESSAGES PART IV

MOAR MESSAGES
Let's go.

SIXTEEN: A GOOD LAF 

“Hi how are you”

Boring, I know. That’s the entirety of the message, however the reason this one is included is because of the guy’s headline:

“Well the person that I’m looking for, has to be very lovely, and to make me lafing, and hard worker. She doesn’t need to be pretty.”

Make me “lafing”…. That’s all. 

I enjoy a good "laf" as much as the next person.

SEVENTEEN: MANLY MAN
“I'm the kind of guy that makes things happen. I like to sing along and goof off. I'm brutally honest as well. If you think you can handle me and my crazy lifestyle let's meet up for a drink or coffee and then go to the next thing if it clicks and we get along. I've never met anyone I couldn't get along with. I'm very manly but I'm sensitive when I need to be. I'm happy and healthy and want to have fun. Fun with the right person. Hit me up if you want to grab coffers or something easy and just chill with some conversation. Take care. Cheers”

 
This manly man is 47. I’m not sure I can handle his crazy lifestyle or his sensitive manliness.

EIGHTEEN: IF YOU’RE SEXY AND YOU KNOW IT….
“You are sexy and we'd have great times together. I like your technical car knowledge and deep interests...
-[Name]”

That’s an odd sentence. "you are sexy and we'd have great times together".. I don’t care much for the structure, it just doesn’t seem to flow. Also no thank you sir.

NINETEEN: THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE TIME TO READ THIS NONSENSE
“I was browsing across match and stumbled your profile and I love the things I read and the pictures I saw. I think you have a wonderful smile, and you seem very interesting and I would love to get to know you better. Also thank you for taking the time to read this message.

So what is your favorite type of car and what is your favorite video game and think that’s so hot”

 
Do these guys not proofread? Why don't they use punctuation marks? 

Yes, detecting elevated levels of dumbassery here.

TWENTY: HUH?
” I ask this question to all girls I am interested in dating, do you like Marilyn Manson?”

Okay….Um….I guess I don’t dislike him. I don’t super like him either. He has a few good songs but I guess I'd say I’m kind of neutral. Wait, why am I even bothering to think about this?